Music: it’s all around us. Except when my roommate sings in the shower, that sounds like gravel in a blender. One time I took him to karaoke and the first song he sung they cut the music and kicked us both out, me just for bringing him. This is a video of a broken air conditioner performing a very impressive improvised jazz drum solo (previously: a Miles Davis trumpet door). Although, with musical talent like this, can you really consider the air conditioner broken? “If it can’t cool a room, yes.” Nice, just making sure.

This is a video of kickboxer Pavel Trussov setting the Guinness World Record for most full-arm extension punches in one minute, with a very respectable 334. He also holds the world record for most full arm extension punches in three minutes, with an equally respectable 919. That is some stamina! For reference, I took a boxing class once and after twenty seconds of punching I was so winded I threw in the towel, took my gloves off, and went to McDonald’s. I still tied the gloves together and hung them over my rearview mirror though since I did have to buy them and want to make it clear to people I’m not to be messed with when I honk at them at red lights.

Keep going for the video, which does include the record keeper with the orange jacket on piercing your soul with her gaze on several occasions.

Because if you’re going to do something, you should do it with flair, this is a short video of a man demonstrating how to open a soda bottle with a bang via a quick palm strike. And since I’m convinced I can do everything I watch in a Youtube video, I went out and bought a 2-liter of soda and brought it home to impress my girlfriend with this trick. “How’d that work out for you?” She screamed at the noise, the bottle top hit her, and I soaked the living room carpet with grape soda. “Soooo….” So about as good as it could have gone.

This is a short video shot from a chairlift at a ski resort in Romania with current snow conditions that can only be described as sad with a side of dirt, of a brown bear chasing a skier down the slope. Some more info while I repeatedly check over my shoulder for bears:

Once the skier realized what was happening, he threw his backpack off, which distracted the bear long enough for him to make a quick getaway. Once officials arrived, the bear had already taken off to the nearby forest.

Thank goodness that appears to be an intermediate slope and not the bunny hill filled with beginners just learning to ski, because otherwise things, uh…things could have turned out differently. And by differently I mean with a ripped and torn ski jacket sale.

Proving there are people out there not afraid to grab life by the balls and swing it around like they’re competing in the Olympic hammer throw, this is a video of Lauri and Anni Vuohensilta of the Hydraulic Press Channel smashing a Subway footlong into a smoothie using a 150-ton hydraulic press and the Smoothie Maker 1,000,000 (which suspiciously like a smoothie bottle, some tubing, and aquarium silicone). It works fairly well, but the clear tube holding the sandwich eventually breaks (presumably after being weakened from having a hole drilled through it). Still, they get a partial, albeit incredibly thick smoothie out of it. Plus with Subway’s current promotion of double the meat for just $2, you can make one hell of a protein shake with this thing! Granted you’re going to puke it all back up after your first swallow, but I’ll still watch and thumbs up the Youtube video when you post it. Then log out and sign in with my secret account to call you a loser and a quitter.

Apparently Bill Nye attempted some standup in the early 80’s because he wasn’t sure if he wanted to go the science or comedy route, and this is the result, courtesy of Seattle Public Access TV channel 29. The first clip is just a single joke from the set, the second video is the entire performance and subsequent interview. It’s not very good, from a comedic standpoint or any other standpoint really. His joke from the first video — I watched it several times and I’m still not sure I understand it. There’s also a third video, which is Bill a few years ago discussing his stand up career (or lack thereof) and once again proving why it wasn’t a success. “Hey — the world needs ditch diggers too,” my dad would tell me every time I failed at a job I thought I’d be good at. I mean, until it was actually ditch digging. Then he just shook his head sadly and wouldn’t look at me.

Bill Nye’s early attempts at stand up comedy is a good reminder that some of you would be better off becoming scientists ❤️🧪 pic.twitter.com/ToJBJNzwu5

— gianmarco (@GianmarcoSoresi) January 25, 2021