In much less dangerous world record news, this is a video of musician and Youtuber Davie504 playing the world record holder for bass guitar with the most strings, with a respectable 69. Nice number choice. Of course it’s hard to play all of those strings at once, which is a

This is a video of big wave surfer/crazy person Sebastian Steudtner riding the new world record for largest wave ever surfed, with an almost unfathomably 26.21-meter (85.99-foot) behemoth. Could you even imagine? I can’t even imagine. And this is coming from a guy who once bodyboarded a 18-incher in Ocean

This is a video of the tiny experimental McMurtry Spéirling electric vehicle setting a new record for the famous hill climb at the Goodwood Festival of Speed in West Sussex, England. The little speed demon managed to finish the 1890m track (1.175-miles, with a total climb of 93.7 vertical meters,

This is a video of Simba, a goat born in Pakistan with 48cm (~19″) ears, making it the new world record holder for longest eared goat. Wow, and to think I make fun of my girlfriend’s earlobes! “You know you’re lucky I don’t make fun of your penis.” Honey —

This is some footage (that leaves something to be desired, namely a better view and an ultra-highspeed camera) of the US Air Force testing a rocket sled traveling at 6,400ft/sec. For reference, a mile is 5,280-feet, so this thing is doing 6,599MPH! That’s Mach 8.6. Holy shit! You know it’s

This is a video of Colombian puggler (that’s puzzle juggler, not to be confused with a juzzler, which is something else entirely) Angel Alvarado setting the Guinness World Record for fastest time solving three Rubik’s Cubes while juggling them, with a fairly respectable 4 minutes 31.01 seconds. Could I do

This is a Guinness World Records video highlighting Zeus (apparently one of only three choices of name for a Great Dane), who was recently confirmed as the world’s tallest living dog, at 1.046 metres (3-foot 5.18-inches) from foot to withers (between shoulder blades), and around seven feet tall standing up.

This is a world map detailing the average lifetime toilet paper usage for different countries, measured in total number of rolls. As you can see, English speaking countries use an absolute shit-ton of toilet paper, with the average American using 141 rolls per year (almost 3 a week?! Lay off