This is a video report from a news agency (BBC) that attacks the hard-hitting stories just like I do, reporting about a baby seal that broke into the home of a New Zealand marine biologist (“Study me!” I imagine the seal thinking) via a cat door, raising heck (even harassing resident cat Coco until it retreated to a neighbor’s home) and hanging out on the sofa until it was politely escorted out. As far as news goes, this is the only sort of story I really care to watch or read about, everything else is just depressing. They say ignorance is bliss, and I aim to live in ecstasy as a moron.