In further proof all those Mars photographs allegedly sent back from the planet by rovers were actually just taken in Texas, this is some footage from a January 30th, 2021 dust storm in Lubbock. Now I’m not here to tell anybody how to prevent preventable problems, but you know what prevents dust storms? “Planting crops so there’s less loose soil?” What? No — appeasing the wind gods with a suitable sacrifice. Now, help me trick my roommate into the middle of this salt circle, I have friends in Lubbock.

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