This is a short video of a pet boa constrictor attacking its owner from above because what else are you gonna do when he’s always treating you like a coat? In his own words (the dude’s, not the snake’s):

I was letting my snake hang out on my coat rack right behind me while I was cleaning and on IG Live. I kept bobbing up and down taunting her and forgetting she was there then she tagged me on my shoulder really quick. No injury, just funny.

Wait — is that your bedroom? Who has a coat rack in their bedroom? Now I’m not sure what brand of cereal you got your interior design degree from, but I’d demand my proof-of-purchases back.