This is a video of a Cheetah family trying to make off with Scottish wildlife videographer Gordon Buchanan’s jacket. Gordon had been following the South African Cheetah family on foot and documenting their lives for the past year, so it makes sense to me why they’d want something to remember him by. Hey — way better your jacket than your femur, Gordon.

Mullets: business up front, party in the rear. Granted I’m not sure exactly what kind of business is up front, but certainly not one I’d ever invest in. These are the finalists from the 2022 Kids Mullet Championship. And what glorious mullets they are. Me? I never had a mullet when I was growing up, but I did have a rat tail (I grew up in Alabama, my actual traced and cut-out silhouette from kindergarten HERE). And I’m fairly certain my mom still has that rat tail in an envelope somewhere. Now, if you’re thinking about making a voodoo doll, forget I mentioned that.

Keep going for even more mullet.

This is a timelapse video of extremely ambidextrous Dutch artist Rajacenna van Dam simultaneously drawing four upside-down portraits with her hands, and two with her feet. Wow! And here I can’t butter a piece of toast without dropping it on the floor. Don’t get me wrong, I still eat it, but not before mashing it up with my toes pretty bad trying to pick it up. “Why don’t you bend over to pick it up?” And risk you trying to jam something in my butt? Nice try!

This is a video of DJ SUAT doing his thing while paragliding over the Austrian Alps with a chest-mounted DJ rig. That’s…something. An absolutely breathtaking view and he spends the whole time staring at an electronic rig. I’m sure there’s a life lesson here somewhere. One about not diddling your knob when you shouldn’t be.

Because elephants are far more kind and considerate that humans, this is a video of a pachyderm deftly picking up and returning a child’s shoe that was dropped inside its enclosure at a Chinese zoo. How about that! It’s given some grass for its trouble, which I’m sure was much appreciated. You try giving me grass as a reward and I’ll fight you. Apparently elephants love it though. Rabbits too. Humping lightning-fast as well. Rabbits, not elephants. Somebody get me a show on Animal Planet.

Thanks to JustA, who agrees earth would be a mucher better place if elephants ruled the world.

This is a video of a dinner table for eight being set with the help of a large spinning glass platter in the center. Is this the most practical way to set a table? I guess that depends on how many plates you’re cool with me breaking spinning the platter too fast. Because by the time I’m done these fine diners are going to be eating off paper plates.