This is a visualization imagining you’re a beam of light leaving the sun and traveling out of our solar system at the speed of light. I mean what other speed would you be traveling, you are a beam of light after all. And I mean that too — you’re a real ray of sunshine in my life. Everyone else I know? Just a bunch of turdy storm clouds. The sort of clouds you hope don’t ruin your weekend plans.

This is a video of Captain Picard performing a song and dance on the Enterprise bridge as a tribute to Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry. Apparently the clip was shot as a surprise for Roddenberry back in 1991, and appeared as a bonus scene in the Season 5 DVD set. And now to celebrate Star Trek: The Next Generation’s 35th anniversary, it’s going around the internet again. Dammit, I said get alien strippers!

In loose lips news, this is a video testing the Air Force’s new ‘Quicksink’ missile, capable of splitting even large ships in two and sending them to Davey Jones’s locker in a hurry. Wow! Thank goodness these didn’t exist when I was a pirate! “When were you a pirate?” During the golden age of piracy! “1650 – 1730?” God no, the late 90’s and early 2000’s. Yarrrr, Napster and LimeWire, me matey!

This is a video of musician The Kiffness (previously) creating a live-looping remix of a man on a Spanish beach selling Coca-Cola. It’s a tasty tropical jam. And I’m not just saying that because I’m a Coke fan, but I am. I mean I always have been, but my parents recently got me hooked on Coke Zero, and now it’s almost all I drink. Do I keep a can on my bedside table? God no, it’s a warm 2-liter.

This is a video of Cassie, a pair of robotic legs inspired by those of an ostrich, setting the world record for fastest 100m run by a two-legged robot. Cassie finishes with a time of 24.73-seconds. For reference, the current world record for a human is Usain Bolt’s 9.58 seconds set in 2009. So Cassie’s finish wasn’t particularly fast for a human, although it looks like it could still outrun that guy with the flannel and camera, so when the robots do go rogue, he’s a goner. I’d say it was nice knowing you, but I was smart enough not to let myself get too close to any slow runners.

Note: Not the whole graphic, click HERE to see the whole thing, or scroll to the bottom.

This is a graphic created by VisualCapitalist depicting where all the world’s 8-billion people live, divided into the six major continents where people and not just penguins actually live (sorry, Antarctica). I learned a lot by looking at it. Mostly, that there are 8-billion people too many on this planet. “You’re welcome, Earth,” I imagine muttering aloud before mashing the big red humanity-ending button à la Thanos finger snap.