This is a video of the always-in-touch Mark Zuckerberg riding a hydrofoil and holding an American flag to celebrate the 4th of July. Oooooor Facebook winning that antitrust lawsuit last week. The video is set to John Denver’s classic ode to West Virginia, ‘Take Me Home, Country Roads,’ although it’s unclear if this was actually filmed in West Virginia. But I highly doubt it. And as someone from West Virginia, I take offense to that. And pretty much everything else I don’t understand. “Magnets?” The devil’s stones! “Traffic roundabouts?” What were the Europeans thinking?! “Pepperoni rolls?” God’s gift to taste buds.

Thanks to MSA, who agrees Zuckerberg probably only posted the video in an attempt to show off his quads when he does those little bunny hops.