This is the Trompe l’oeil (Optical illusion) neoprene wetsuit from American Designer Thom Browne. It costs $3,900 and looks like a business suit, so when you’re out there catching waves you can pretend it’s just another day at the office. And maybe King Triton will finally take a business meeting with me since he had me kicked out last time for not being appropriately dressed. “You were naked.” Merpeople don’t wear clothes! “You’re not a merperson.” True. “Plus you were waving your penis around telling him you’d fight a swordfish for a hundred clams.” That offer stills stands, by the way.