Presumably to keep that hot sauce-on-pepper eating maniac entertained while he’s moaning and groaning away on the toilet, this is the Potty Piano from JZENZERO and available on Amazon for around $16. It’s a foot-operated digital keyboard like the one Tom Hanks plays in Big, but small and made to

In surprisingly not April Fool’s Day news, Miller Lite released a line of bar smell inspired candles (pre-orders currently sold out), with all sale proceeds going to the US Bartenders’ Guild Foundation, which “empowers bartenders to take charge of their careers through peer-to-peer learning, expert instruction, and service projects.” The

The exact couch you don’t want to see when you have the spins, this is the Adaptation Sofa designed by Fabio Novembre for purveyor of luxury furniture Cappellini. It looks like it’s leaning but the actual seat cushions are flat across. Obviously, I call the far right seat with maximum

Because occasionally drunken cheeseburger-eating prayers do get answered, this is the $20 David Hasselhoff Chia Pet available for pre-order from Entertainment Earth (presumably among other places). Obviously, as far as Chia Pets to practice your kissing on go, this is a pretty good one. Also Bob Ross and any of

Because can you even call yourself a band if you don’t have at least one instrument that looks like a creepy baby doll, these are the $300 BabyBot musical synthesizers created and sold by Moonlight Armada. Available in light theremin (red) and analog synthesizer (purple) editions, both are ‘set up

Because this is the world we live in, these are the ‘Wearing Mask On Bottom of Chin Illusion’ face masks made by Maskalike. They’re available in ten different styles in a variety of skin tones and cost $28. You can also send them photos of your own mug and they’ll

Can you never decide what to eat? You sound like my girlfriend. Enter the dishwasher safe Panwaffle ($20 on Amazon), a waffle/pancake iron that makes a waffle in the center of a pancake, for the best of both worlds. Of course as soon as I’ve got the batter mixed and

This is the very real and very available on Amazon FartVac, a $12 hose and bulb vacuum with an activated carbon filter at the end designed to suck up farts from your pants before filtering the smell out of them and releasing them back into the wild. Now I know