Sold by the Anvy Luna Store on Amazon (affiliate link), this wine bottle aerator looks like a skull puking blood as you pour. Available in silver and gold finishes, if skulls aren’t your thing (they should be everybody’s thing is the thing), they also have deer and lion head models

Manufactured by novelty product company Fred, Chomp is a pair of silicone pot holders that look like classic wind-up chattering teeth. Or my grandma’s dentures. Admittedly, I could use some pot holders, because I’ve just been wetting my hands with cold water and picking up and putting down scalding pots

This is Vino, a corkscrew/bottle opener combo designed by Adi Kafri for OTOTO Studio (available here on Amazon for $23) that looks like a little bat. The bat’s wings move up and down as a bottle is opened and the cork is pulled out. Speaking of — I think I’ll

This is the Han Solo in carbonite waffle maker manufactured and sold by Pangea ($54 on Amazon). According to the Amazon reviews, it makes very thick waffles that take extra time to cook. I’m okay with that. After all *carefully adding giant circular boobs to stick figure painting* perfection takes

This is the Cupa Joe coffee mug made by Barbuzzo and available on Amazon ($20). It holds 20-ounces of coffee and looks like the glass carafe that sits beneath a multi-cup coffee maker. I just bought one because I love novelty coffee mugs. Plus this way the next time my

This is the ~$13 ‘Running Behind’ condiment bottle topper created by Sir Perky. It screws on to a variety of standard threaded bottle tops and makes it look like a little person is pooping out whatever is in the bottle. REAL MATURE. It also comes with a tiny butt plug