Clearly cast in Caddyshackcasually sinking a backwards no-look putt during the annual Pebble Beach Pro-Am. Could I have done that? Of course I could have done that, just probably not on my first try. Or second. Or with all the people around. And the pressure of the cameras. I guess what I’m getting at is no, no I couldn’t have done that.

Being a member of an elite force like the Shenzen Special Police requires things I don’t have *trying to reach TV remote with rolled up magazine* things like strength and endurance. And this is a video of the Special Police’s physical exam used to determine a candidate’s fitness. It involves a little bit of everything, including (in order): knot tying, running, crawling, climbing over things, rope swinging, parkour, monkey bars, wall scaling, rappelling, tire flipping, disassembling and reassembling a firearm, and signing your name. After a close and honest examination of the video, I determined I would have failed right around– “The knot tying portion.” How did you know?! “Your velcro shoes.” Congratulations, you just passed your detective exam!

This is a video of disc golfer and TikToker Robbie C attempting a putt, missing, and the disc rolling back towards him. But, as life often likes to do, insult is added to that injury when the disk hits some snow and instead of stopping continues to sled even further past him. Brutal! The only thing that would have made it worse is if a penguin grabbed the disc after it came to a stop and jumped into the ocean with it. And by worse I mean better, because that would have been one hell of a video.

@foundationdg Dang… hate to see it happen @Robbie C #discgolf #fail #fyp ♬ Oh No – Kreepa

Thanks again to JustA, who insisted she get a super supreme platinum star sticker for her three tips today, which I agreed to, despite me not actually having any super supreme platinum star stickers. Settle for a heart drawn on the white board in the basement?

In the opposite of that smooth as silk last post, this is a video of a snowboarder attempting some sort of flippy trick against a wall and getting the tip of their board perfectly stuck in a crack, leaving them suspended upside down, Luke Skywalker in a wampa cave style. Are they still there? Probably. I mean unless they were able to use the Force to grab their lightsaber and slice themselves free, then spend the night inside a tauntaun to stay warm before returning to the lodge in the morning. So yeah, they’re probably still there.

@salzwoman Reply to @yazidayoub12 ♬ originalljud – Christoffer Stål

Thanks again to JustA, who agrees shoot for the moon, even if you miss you may just burn up reentering the atmosphere, but at least you tried.

This is an incredibly smooth video of a man casually trick-kicking a discarded drink bottle into the back of a garbage truck like he does this all the time. And maybe he does. They do say practice makes perfect, and I don’t know if anyone could ever do this on their first try. There’s also the possibility this man has superhuman powers. I’m leaning towards that. Remember: the simplest answer is usually the right one.

@espn Don’t litter! (via @Mr. NYC) #futbol #soccer #clean #smooth ♬ original sound – Ian Asher

Thanks to JustA, who agrees that, like this guy just did, we need to make not littering cool again.

Because all Titanic movies end the same, this is a supercut of the ship going down from five different movies, featuring a depiction of the sinking ship from 1953’s Titanic, 1958’s A Night To Remember, 1979’s SOS Titanic, James Cameron’s 1997 Titanic, and 2000’s Britannic (which was actually about White Star Line’s Britannic ship and not the Titanic). All the footage has been mashed together with the same fake film artifact effect added to provide continuity. Conveniently removed from the video is the footage of Rose slowly killing Jack in the freezing cold waters of the Atlantic. You know, now that I think about it, she really did have the Heart of the Ocean — pitch black and cold.

Thanks to my dad, who agrees if you have the chance to not go down with a sinking ship, it’s best to exercise that option.