This is ‘A New View Of The Moon’, a worthwhile short created by filmmakers Wylie Overstreet and Alex Gorosh, who brought a high-powered telescope to the sidewalks of Los Angeles and invited strangers to take an up-close glimpse of our natural satellite. Their reactions are great, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t choke up a little, but only because there was a bone in my chicken salad. “That’s egg salad, and he was crying like a baby.” Honey! “What?” I could use a change and a nap.

This is a video of fifth generation tatami (traditional Japanese woven straw mat) craftsman Kenji Yamada producing a giant dragon design for a room. How awesome is that? If you take martial arts lessons in a dojo with a floor that looks like this, there’s no way your sensei doesn’t know how to throw hadoukens. Now whether he’ll teach you how to throw them is an entirely different question, one probably based on you proving yourself and not admitting you only want to learn them to perform elaborate fart pranks that involve blowing holes through walls like the Kool-Aid Man.

This is Gotye’s 2012 (has it really been that long?) hit ‘Somebody That I Used To Know’ as arranged and performed as a medieval/bardcore song (complete with lyrics) by Hildegard von Blingin’ and Friar Funk. I don’t know about you, but it makes me want to go to a Renaissance Faire and drink a bunch of mead and throw axes. I will have to wear a full knight’s helm though, otherwise I may be recognized and kicked out for my behavior last year. “You burnt down the king and queen’s tent and raided the blacksmith’s workshop.” To my credit, I thought Renaissance Faires were more battle reenactment oriented. “Is that even true?” Only the first time.

This is a video of engineer Allen Pan of Youtube Channel Sufficiently Advanced (God, I’ll never be) constructing a ridiculous robotic social distancing arm out of a 10-foot military RolaTube (think of a ten foot slap bracelet, designed for creating an instantly rigid antennae mast in the field, but is still easy to transport in its rolled-up form). While Allen’s engineering is certainly impressive, the final result is incredibly slow and loud. “Like you.” Like me, or a tortoise with a bullhorn. WE’RE COMING FOR YOU, HARE.

Thanks to Alex S, who agrees if you can’t reach it with one of those plastic shark or t-rex jaws grabbers, it isn’t worth it.

This is a video of pianist Florian Mohr performing a nine minute medley of what he believes are the best cartoon theme songs, including anime and comic TV series. It really brought back some memories. Mostly of Saturday mornings, watching cartoons and the worried look on my mom’s face grow with every bowl of Chocolate Frosted Sugar Rockets I finish, her knowing I’ll be bouncing off the walls at any moment and she’ll have to trap me under a laundry basket and sit on top of it until I crash and pass out. Those were the days, weren’t they? “Not at all.” My mom, ladies and gentlemen! She’s a saint, she really is.

This is a video from Perryville, Missouri of Jake climbing a near-vertical wall in his rock bouncer. What’s a rock bouncer? Apparently not the world’s shittiest piece of playground equipment. Some more info while I wish pieces didn’t break off my car every time I run over a curb:

Jake going up a man-made hill with his rock bouncer. Friends and rock racers got together over a weekend to ‘play around’ in their bouncers (like monster trucks but way cooler) and work out any problems that the buggies might have. Rock bouncing is a form of racing but coming up hills that are next to impossible to climb but these guys do it. They compete in different races over the southern US for money, trophies and bragging rights. At the end of the day, all the guys/girls had a great time and lots of buggies got broken.

Man, I wish I had the money to get involved in a hobby like this. Unfortunately, right now my budget is less rock bouncing and more rock skipping at the river by the old railroad tracks. I also drink warm beer there and think about life and whether any of the frogs are actually princesses with curses on them. “Please tell me you don’t try kissing them.” *rubbing ointment on lips* Me? Never.