Because dream it and you can achieve it (unless you’re painfully unqualified like most of the people I meet and try to inspire in real life), this is a video of musician Charles Berthoud covering Scott Joplin’s classic of all ragtime classics ‘The Entertainer’, with a fingerstyle performance on electric bass. He does a fantastic job, and if I close my eyes I can almost taste the hot whiskey and cigar smoke in the saloon as a gunfight erupts. Was it me — did I shoot myself in the leg again? Maybe!

Because nature is a trip, this is a video captured by SCUBA instructor Frida Yolotzin of a young rainbow tripod fish in the waters of Cozumel. After maturity, the fish relocates to the abyssal zone of the deep sea at depths of 0.5 – 3 miles, where it will be shrouded in darkness for the rest of its life. It reminds me a lot of myself in that way. Especially if it isn’t nearly as attractive or hopeful as it was when it was young and at the surface.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Frida Yolotzin ♥ Jonguitud (@frida.yolotzin)

NOTE: VOLUME DOWN.

This is a video of the Beyond The Press Youtube channel of 7,000 bricks of recalled fireworks all being ignited at once. But why were they recalled? Were they too unsafe? They’re FIREWORKS. Regardless, the all-at-once show is glorious. I only wish I could have been there to jump a motorcycle through them all. You know — because that’s what I do. “Dumb sh!t?” I was going to say death-defying acts of bravery, but I suppose at the very heart of everything I’ve ever done in my life, there has been a steaming pile of dumb sh!t at the bottom, yes.

Keep going for the video, but the good stuff starts at 5:40, with probably my favorite view of the action at 9:19.

These are a couple videos of Aaron the (unsurprisingly vocal) Husky speaking to his owners in their own Italian accent, which he presumably picked up from them. My dogs? They probably haven’t picked up much of an accent from me, but there’s no question they’ve learned every dirty word in the book. That book being ‘The Definitive Guide To Dirty Words’, just to be clear. You should hear the things they bark at other dogs on walks! I’ve never been so proud.

@aaronthehusky_ Ai commenti negativi “ ma che vuo?”😂#tiktoklover #tiktok #huskysiberianotiktok #husky #siberianhusky #husky #myhusky #viralvideo #tiktok ♬ suono originale – Antonia

@aaronthehusky_

Quante volte mi ha mandato a quel paese?😂

♬ suono originale – Antonia

This is a supercut of musician Luke Pickman performing The Lick on 111 different instruments in 111 seconds. That’s one instrument every second. I know because I just crunched the numbers. It wasn’t easy using the new common core math, and things got pretty hairy there for a bit with the decimals and long division, but I made it. I remember back in high school math class not being allowed to use a calculator on a test because, “You won’t always have a calculator in real life.” Thank goodness Mrs. McKinley was a math teacher and not a fortune teller.

Because who doesn’t wouldn’t ketchup that looks exactly like kid’s glue, Youtuber and food scientist Barry Lewis decied to try to make his own transparent ketchup after repeatedly being sent a faked photo of the clear condiment. In the end he makes a pretty decent version (recipe HERE), the main issue being the consistently is much runnier than traditional ketchup. Still, he did it. So Heinz, if you were looking for a way to blow a bunch more money like you did with the purple, green, and blue ketchups of the early 2000’s, have at it. Just remember: there’s a reason Crystal Pepsi doesn’t exist anymore, and that’s because Pepsi sucks. Food for thought. Probably a hotdog with mustard only.