Tired of arguing over who’s on whose side of the bed, Redditor jonathan881 bought himself a $40 laser line and mounted it in the bedroom to divide the bed perfectly in half. No word if the laser is powerful enough to burn an arm or leg that crosses it, but in my mind I can already smell the smoldering body hair.

“In our house there is no debate, ONLY DATA,” writes Jonathan. “I asked whom she thought was the more frequent offender, she guessed 50/50 i’m no noob…this is totally playful, no spite at all. I’m a lucky guy.”

Do you know how I make sure I get my fair share of bed space? “Yeah, not having a girlfriend.” Works like a charm. Although I do have an 11-pound dog that likes to sleep right in the middle of the bed. Plus she hogs all the pillows. I’ve tried to argue that bed space and pillows should be divided according to body weight, but she argues they should be divided according to furriness and number of legs, so I dropped it and had to sleep on the sofa.