I have to jump off!
Woman Trying To Get Off Roof Falls Crotch-First Onto Fence

This is some security cam footage of a woman who was trying to help a locked-out neighbor regain access to her apartment via the balcony when she discovered that door was also locked (A+ for security) and would have to climb back down to the ground. She wasn’t expecting this, nor had she planned for it, and ends up standing on top of a fence that clearly wasn’t made for standing, refusing a step ladder, and jumping off in the absolute worst way possible, perfectly crotching herself on the fence. That roll-away she performed afterward was top-notch though.

Dude: *offering his back to climb down onto* Slowly come down.
Chick: Dude I can’t f***ing come down, I have to jump off.
Dude: Okay…good luck.
Chick: *CRASH!* Uhhhhhh, f***.