In other world record news, this is the Redfin listing for a home in Glendora, California that sold last year for $780,000 (and is currently estimated to be worth almost $1-million because the housing market is totally boinked) and has what can only be described as “the world’s worst floorplan.” It’s like somebody was playing Tetris and just slammed down all the pieces willy-nilly. I’ve included a bunch of shots of the actual interior as well, and while the individual rooms themselves don’t look all that bad (besides all the junk in the bonus room) it seems unusual to have 3 of the 4 bedrooms (including the master) only accessible via walking through the bonus room AND A SHARED BATHROOM. Nobody can go to their room, I’m pooping! Also, whoever lives there better pray they never have a house fire, because there’s no way firefighters are finding anybody or anything in that house.

Keep going for a bunch of shots, which led me to believe the person who bought it told the realtor, “As long as it has a cool outdoor bar, I don’t care about anything else.”

The real heart of the house: this shared walk-thru bathroom.

This is a video highlighting the life of Fenrir Antares Powers, a Savannah cat whose name is as long as Fenrir is tall, being the current Guinness World Record holder for tallest living domestic cat. Fenrir measures a respectable 47.83 cm (18.83 in) from toe beans to withers (top of the shoulder blade), and acts as a therapy cat for his human caretaker’s medical practice. Some more info while I wonder if my cats could be world record holders in anything besides getting me up too early, and furthest distance a turd has been found from the litter box:

This guy follows me room to room, hops up on the exam table when I greet the patient, and gets to work on making them feel safe and comfortable. …He will see patients with me, following me room to room until he starts to tire out, then he’ll usually stay in one room and curl up on a chair somewhere and snooze until lunchtime.

It’s crazy to think all these people have such good, well behaved pets and I have a bunch that seem to have escaped from the gates of hell. “You know, they say pets take after their owners.” Oh really? So they probably feel like attacking you now too.




Because why should I have to physically travel somewhere just to half-assedly cross something off my bucket list, this is a 4K point-of-view video of a ride down the alpine coaster located in Kandersteg, Switzerland. I felt like I was there! The wind in my hair, the fresh mountain air…getting launched out of an alpine coaster in a sharp turn because I refused to use the handbrake. Honestly, I enjoyed the experience so much I actually looked up flights to Switzerland before remembering 1) I already sold my good kidney and 2) just how much I hate flying anywhere but in my dreams. It’s awesome, I can just run and take off. I only wish I didn’t have to lose all my teeth too.




Presumably much to the delight of Meghan Treanor, this is a video of low bass-singer Geoff Castellucci covering ‘Ghost Riders In The Sky’ while dressed as a group of ghastly cowboys. He has a deep voice. You know who also has a deep voice? Me. You probably didn’t know it since you only read what I say and don’t hear it, but I’ve got the sort of booming voice you really feel in your, well — you know. “Ballsack.” It’s true. As a matter of fact, along with some Johnny Cash songs, ‘Ghost Riders In The Sky’ is one of the few songs I’ll sing at karaoke. My buddy Tim and I used to perform it duet style and bring the house down with just how insanely drunk and terrible we were. It was just…screaming and making cowboy whip and pistol sounds.




Real-life versions of things: they always turn out way scarier than the cartoon/video game version. Case in point: this real-life Pikachu crafted by model maker Adam of Youtube channel North Of The Border. Terrifying little electric bastard, isn’t it? Definitely not the sort of monster I’d feel comfortable carrying around in my pocket with nothing but a Poké Ball separating my nuts from 1.21 jigawatts.




This is a video of everybody’s favorite acapella group (unless your friends or family are in one, or you’re still hanging onto Rockapella from Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?) Maytree performing some sound effects of the time-traveling Delorean from Back To The Future, along with the theme (with the Back To The Future logo blurred out on the band’s iPad for whatever reason). It was a delight to watch. Maybe not as delightful to watch as another bet paying dividends because you have a Grays Sports Almanac with 50 years of sports results from the future, but I would have made Biff Tannen’s Pleasure Paradise look like the first little pig’s house compared to the extravagance of my own space casino.