This is a video of jump roper Cen Xiaolin setting a new world speed record with an astonishing 228 jumps (technically alternate leg skips) in 30 seconds. That’s 7.6 jumps PER SECOND. Cen has been at it the speed jumping for awhile, and his record 8 years ago was only 108 jumps, so he’s more than doubled it in that time. How far can he go? My guess is ALL THE WAY. I don’t even know what that means, but I believe in him. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say I could never move that fast even if I was on fire, which I often am.

Keep going for the new record, as well as Cen’s previous record from 2016 for reference.

This is a video from Kuwait of a driver barrel rolling a Toyota FJ Cruiser on the beach and getting launched out the door into the water like the vehicle was equipped with ejector seats. Damn! He’s lucky to have limped away from that. Also, did he mean for that to happen? It almost seems too perfect. Maybe this was a cry for help. Or maybe it was just an idiot doing dumb sh1t in a vehicle like happens a million times a day all over the world. Speaking of — you think I can drift into that parking space? “That’s a cart return.” Here goes nothing!

This is a video of one of the world’s largest mozzarella sticks being made at Twisted Sourdough Pizza in Las Vegas. Apparently some folks online (typical) told the folks at Twisted that their mozz sticks WEREN’T actually the largest, so they started making them even bigger. Each $13 Famous Mozzarati Stick uses a cuboid piece of cheese approximately 10″ long and 1″ in diameter BEFORE breading and frying. I wonder how many calories each one is. Also, how many do I have to eat in one sitting to get my picture on the wall? My picture on the wall for defeating a certain number of giant mozz sticks, not projectile vomiting in the restaurant, just to be clear.

@unlokt The BIGGEST MOZZARELLA STICKS in the World? #mozzarella #mozzarellasticks #lasvegas #vegasfood #lasvegas #vegastiktok #foodontiktok #viralfood #cheesepull ♬ Still Hot – Nic D & Connor Price

These are a couple clips from a recent NBA game between the Indiana Pacers and Los Angeles Lakers, where the Pacers used a filter to make Lakers fans on the jumbotron look like they were crying at the very end of the game with the Pacers up 19 points. Obviously, every professional sports stadium is going to start doing this because how could you not? Probably unbeknownst to the creators at the time, this is exactly why those filters were invented in the first place. Well, except the one that makes you look like a dancing hot dog. That one was made for sexting.

🚨AI IN REAL-TIME

NBA Pacers used Snapchat AI filters to make it look like Los Angeles Lakers fans were crying during the game. pic.twitter.com/6js1W6wWsk

— Mario Nawfal (@MarioNawfal) March 30, 2024

This is a clip from BBC Earth and my main man knight Sir David Attenborough highlighting the web-slinging capabilities of Darwin’s bark spider. The spider is capable of blasting a continuous fan of webbing that catches the wind like a sail and can cross a body of water up to 25-meters (~82-feet across). And just when you thought you were safe from spiders on an island in the stream. Darwin’s bark spider silk is also recognized as the world’s strongest natural fiber. So, if you were wondering what I’ll be sewing my underwear out of from now on, it’s Darwin’s bark spider silk. I’m kidding, they’ll be old t-shirts and bedsheets like they’ve always been.

Keep going for the fascinating video, which does include some closeup web-shooting for you weirdos.

Presumably determined to never get spun around by a red shell or banana peel again, this is a video of a dude cruising around in his homemade 19-tire go kart (I partiand a coffin-shaped gas tank right behind the seat). ULTRA TRACTION. Although most of those tires look like they’re in absolutely piss-poor shape. Personally, I’d prefer four good tires to 19 sh1tty ones, but that’s just me and I’d honestly prefer a jetpack to any tires, and monster truck tires to any other tires.

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