Pikachu, I do not choose you!
Real Products That Exist: Pokemon Centipede Body Pillows

These are the almost certainly unlicensed ‘Very Long Pikachu Insect Plushes’ available from Chinese online retailer AliExpress. They cost between $21 and $90 depending on length (available in 80cm, 1.1m, 1.4m and 1.7m varieties), and seeing one (or, even worse, one of every length) on a potential lover’s bed, is a sure sign you should probably start making excuses and your way to the nearest exit, lest you wake up in an ice bath with missing organs. Just trust me. Fool me once *lifting shirt to reveal scar on back* shame on you, fool me twice *turning around to reveal scar on belly* she even took my stomach.

Keep going for a bunch more shots.