Did you know there’s a viral cheese-pulling trend on TikTok? I did not, that was news to me. Not good news, mind you, but not the worst either. Anyways, Doritos decided they’d jump on the Gen Z bandwagon by setting a world record for world’s longest cheese-pull, with an admittedly respectable 49-feet. Although from what I could gather watching the video, it looks like the 265-pounds of melted cheddar and mozzarella was actually INSIDE the chip, and so it was pulled DOWN from the helicopter, which allowed the cheese to continue oozing to thicken its string without breaking and should nullify this record. Just for reference, I don’t film myself pulling cheese. I just do it with my teeth right after yanking the pizza out of the oven and burn the everliving sh!t out of my lips and mouth. I constantly look like I’ve been trying to eat acid. Also, more than once I’ve swallowed a molten Totino’s Pizza Roll right out of the oven and had to go to the hospital.