You know what your underwear drawer has been missing? A nudie magazine tucked away at the bottom. Also: a pair of inflatable beach ball underwear. Thankfully, Etsy seller CandyCoatedSqueaks has you covered with these made-to-order Inflatable PVC Plastic Beach Ball Underwear/Shorts. The beach ballers, presumably made to satisfy some sort of fetish I want no part of, start at $138, but jump to $178 for a reinforced outer, and $218 for reinforced inner AND outer, which you’re probably going to need if you’re going to get as kinky as these underwear demand. Still, that’s pretty pricey for a pair of beach ball underwear. If I were you I’d just buy a regular beach ball, poke waist and leg holes in it, then lay in bed and tell your girlfriend to pretend she’s spiking a beach volleyball.

keep going for several more shots, including one of what it looks like standing in the bathroom after removing your beach ball underwear. And yes, that’s a man in a bodysuit, not a mannequin.