Butt masks are a real product that exists. Bawdy Butt Masks, made by DOPE Naturally (WTF is going on here?), the masks come in four varieties: BITE IT (plant based collagen, hydrating + toning), SLAP IT (caffeine infused, retexturing + detoxifying), SHAKE IT (marine algae, firming + illuminating), and SQUEEZE

Because who doesn’t want to use the carpool lane when they’re driving alone (but things look so much faster over there!), this is the inflatable Grinch Car Buddy with Scarf from Gemmy. He costs $42 on Amazon and buckles into a car seat so you have somebody to talk to

Because there’s no better way to let the loved ones on your shopping list know they’re getting guns for Christmas this year, these are the tactical Christmas stockings from Garud. The $15 stockings are available on Amazon, come in eight different colors and patterns (including pink camo and a bone

Have $200 burning a hole in your pocket and been on the lookout for a bronze or white colored raccoon holding a lightbulb lamp? Well then you’re in luck my friend, because Anthropologie is selling them! Cast from resin, the lamps will certainly “add a bit of whimsy to a

Because who doesn’t want to pretend they’re stepping into the future when they get home instead of a cheap apartment with an ongoing roach problem, this is the $25 officially licensed Back To The Future II hoverboard doormat available from Firebox. Now granted I haven’t seen the movie in a

These are the food-safe, ultra-realistic human skull bowls crafted and sold by Etsy shop CatacombCulture. They hold 16-ounces, come in a variety of different colors, and are hand wash only and NOT microwave safe. I am okay with that. Unfortunately, they cost $175+ depending on color, which I am much

Because who doesn’t want the salty, vinegar-y taste of a pickle on their lips at all times, this is Mr. Pickle’s World Famous Pickle Lip Balm ($12 on Amazon). Questionable world fame aside, the $12 lip balm seems to be promoted as a gag gift, which makes sense since(!) I

This is the Puking Kitty Gravy Boat originally created by glass artist Ginger Ames all the way back in 2012, which were only available for a limited time and quickly sold out. Well now Ginger and her husband have decided to start reselling the puking kitties after being featured on