Because the internet, like an old fashioned butter churn filled with who-knows-what, never stops producing something to melt into the pockets of your Eggo, this is a video of a man recreating the intro to Michael Jackson’s ‘Smooth Criminal’ by bouncing a ping pong ball off the strings of a guitar. Then he starts singing and leaning hard on a broom, and the song abruptly ends. What happened — did he accidentally impale himself on his broom? I need more of this. Also, if I were a high school guidance counselor and this kid told me this is what he wanted to do with his life I’d tell him that’s quite possibly the smartest decision I’ve ever heard and to leave school this instant to get back to his precious ping pong balls.

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