This is the very real and very available on Amazon FartVac, a $12 hose and bulb vacuum with an activated carbon filter at the end designed to suck up farts from your pants before filtering the smell out of them and releasing them back into the wild. Now I know

Captured in the Ecuadorian rain forest by wildlife photographer and videographer David Weiller, this is a video of a monkey slug caterpillar (the larval stage of a hag moth), which is neither monkey nor slug but is a caterpillar, and mimics a tarantula so things don’t try to eat it.

Butt masks are a real product that exists. Bawdy Butt Masks, made by DOPE Naturally (WTF is going on here?), the masks come in four varieties: BITE IT (plant based collagen, hydrating + toning), SLAP IT (caffeine infused, retexturing + detoxifying), SHAKE IT (marine algae, firming + illuminating), and SQUEEZE

To promote it’s deep fried turkey sandwiches, Arby has released this limited edition Deep Fried Turkey Pillow, a $60 helmet pillow in the shape of a turkey that you can stick your head up the rear of to nap. Me? I don’t need a pillow to nap, I can fall

Because who has the space for a whole tree, this is ‘The Against The Wall Christmas Tree’ available from purveyor of things nobody really needs Hammacher Schlemmer for $250. It’s available pre-lit with all white lights or multicolored. Would a full tree cost $500? We may never know. Or care.

This is the officially licensed Godzilla bust tissue dispenser made by Japanese company Rotary Hero. The box is designed to be displayed vertically, and the tissue next in line for use appears almost as if it’s smoke billowing from Godzilla’s mouth. I like how they spelled out GODZILLA on the

This is familee_furrr, a freaky deaky video (and music) from Ghost Skool that starts with a little Furbee concert and ends with a family pretending they’re a really shitty Voltron worm and crawling under their living room coffee table. Honestly, the only part of it I actually liked was when

This is a video of the ‘Snatcher’ chameleon inspired robotic tongue developed by researchers at South Korea’s Seoul National University of Science and Technology. Some more info while I use one of those sticky hand toys from a 25¢ machine to steal Starbursts from my coworker’s desk: “For example, a