In why hasn’t somebody added Miley Cyrus’s ‘Wrecking Ball’ to this news, here’s a home video of Michael Chicoine testing a children’s zipline, despite the fact it’s probably made for kids under 120 pounds and not 220-pound adult men capable of generating so much momentum before hitting the spring brake at the end. Nice backflip though, but apparently he fractured two fingers during the dismount. I’m afraid that will result in a point deduction. “I’ve got my eyes on you, Michael Chicoine,” Death commented via email.

@michaelchicoine #TheAdamProject #TurboTaxAlphorn #epicfail #part2 #failarmy #barstoolsports #zipline #FHV #SchickAsks #stcharlesil #nobreaks ♬ original sound – Michael Chicoine

Thanks to JustA, who agrees weight limits were made to be broken. Bones too.